Tag Archives: Intention

Taking the Blinders Off

If any of you sin without knowing it, doing any of the things that by the Lord’s commandments ought not to be done, you have incurred guilt, and are subject to punishment.
Leviticus 5:17 (NRSV)

I received an e-mail from a front-line manager of one of our clients. In a regular report that went to the executive team I had mentioned something that caused an executive Vice-President of the company to question the front-line manager’s handling of one particular circumstance. This caught the manager off guard and caused the manager to feel thrown under the bus. It had never been my intention to do so, and I honestly had not anticipated that my report would create the executive’s concern.

My initial human reaction was defensive. My report was accurate. I said nothing that was untrue. I was only doing my job. I couldn’t have anticipated how the report would be received. Yada, yada, yada…. My excuses did nothing to address the unintended injury. I quickly responded with a sincere apology and I committed to being more aware in the future and to letting the manager know if anything in my future reports might create similar questions.

Along life’s journey, I’ve observed that we often plod along with blinders on, unaware (or unconcerned) how our words and actions may affect others. When confronted, I have noted that our natural human reaction is usually the same as mine in this case: excuse, shift blame, and/or deflect personal responsibility.

Today’s chapter is a list of ways the ancient sacrificial system God established through Moses addressed mistakes we as humans with our blinders on:

  • and are unaware of it… (vs. 2)
  • and are unaware of it… (vs. 3)
  • and are unaware of it… (vs. 4)
  • When you realize your guilt… (vs. 5)
  • When any of you commit a trespass and sin unintentionally… (vs. 14)

The message is clear. Just because I am unaware of something I have done does not excuse me from responsibility for my words and actions. Guilt is not excused by ignorance or self-justification.

This morning as I read, I must confess that I found myself mulling over a few things others have recently said and done that pissed me off. Words and actions that created problems for myself and others. I thought of the human blinders we wear and the way these individuals act unaware, excuse their behavior, shift blame, and avoid responsibility. Then, I remembered the e-mail and my initial reaction to it. I have my own blinders. People are people. We are all guilty of unintended injuries, even to those we love most in this world.

Today I’m thinking of ways I can take the blinders off as I journey through the day. I want to be more aware of my words and my actions, and the potential or their unintended effects.

 

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Haunted by a Seemingly Simple Question

When Jesus saw him lying there and knew that he had been there a long time, he said to him, “Do you want to be made well?”
John 5:6 (NRSV)

As I journey again and again through God’s Message, there are certain words, phrases, and stories that haunt me. Every time I encounter them they impact my spirit in a profound way. I can’t escape them. They come to mind at random times. And, despite the perpetual impact I always sense that the full truth of them continue to elude me.

In today’s chapter, it’s the simple question Jesus asks of a paralytic who, for 38 years, had lain on his mat next to a pool that was rumored to have healing powers.

“Do you want to get well?”

Really, Jesus? Really? Seriously? Are you kidding me? I make my family carry me here every day for 38 years hoping for a miracle. I sit here every day. This is my life. And, you want to know if I want to get well. What a silly question.

But it’s not silly at all. I have learned along life’s road, and from my own experience, that my true motives are often hidden beneath carefully crafted appearances. I say I want healing, but the truth is I am content in my sickness. I complain about our sicknesses, weaknesses, and shortcomings , but I’ve become so used to living with them that I’m secretly afraid of life without them. I complain about my paralysis, but if actually do learn to walk my family is going to expect me to actually get a job. Hm.

Being a victim comes with addictive perks that we don’t really talk about.

“Do you want to get well?”

There’s a lot more to that question than it seems. There are layers of questions in those six words. Many of them are uncomfortable questions I’m not sure I want asked. Today, I’m once again haunted by a seemingly simple question Jesus asked.

New Places, New Faces: Wisdom Required

meredithWhen David’s envoys came to Hanun in the land of the Ammonites to express sympathy to him, the Ammonite commanders said to Hanun, “Do you think David is honoring your father by sending envoys to you to express sympathy? Haven’t his envoys come to you only to explore and spy out the country and overthrow it?” 1 Chronicles 19:3 (NIV)

I’ll never forget seventh grade. That was the first year of what used to be called Junior High School and is now generally referred to as Middle School. All of the local elementary schools fed into Meredith Junior High. For seven years I had attended school with pretty much the same group of kids. We knew each other. We’d grown up together. Now, we were all dispersed among four or five times the number of kids from all over town.

I can remember the anxiety that came with those early days of seventh grade. You feel awkward enough as it is when you’re twelve or thirteen years old, but then to be placed in a new school with a host of new kids you didn’t know could feel disconcerting. I met all sorts of new friends. Some were positive influences on me, others not so much.

I thought about those days as I read inexperienced Prince Hanun taking the throne and filling his fathers shoes. I have no idea how old Hanun was, but I pictured him as a young man suddenly thrust into leadership and his commanders all jockeying for favor with the new monarch. They whispered in his year during a time of anxiety and fear. Hanun proved ignorant, or foolish, or both. He listened to the wrong advice and it cost him his crown.

Being in a new place can be a scary time. Whether it’s living in a new community, attending a new school, or working at a new job, there is a certain period of time it takes to get oriented and learn the ropes. You also tend to meet a lot of new people who have a whole lot of advice for you emanating from their own self-serving agendas. This morning I am reminded that wisdom and discernment are greatly needed during these stretches of life’s journey. New “friends” you meet in these situation often prove the great wisdom I learned from Looney Tunes as a kid: “With a friend like that, who needs enemies?”

To-morrow, and To-morrow, and To-morrow

Patrick Stewart as Macbeth.
Patrick Stewart as Macbeth.

When your days are over and you rest with your ancestors, I will raise up your offspring to succeed you, your own flesh and blood, and I will establish his kingdom. He is the one who will build a house for my Name, and I will establish the throne of his kingdom forever. 2 Samuel 7:12-13 (NIV)

  • When I was five I intended to grow up and be an astronaut.
  • When I was seven I intended to grow up and become President of the United States.
  • When I was ten I intended to go into the navy and become a naval aviator.
  • When I was thirteen I intended to become a lawyer and politician.
  • When I was sixteen I intended to become a great evangelist like Billy Graham.

It was never  my intention to live in Pella, Iowa. It was never my intention to spend twenty years in the customer research and quality assessment business or to be a business owner. It was never my intention to be divorced and remarried.

As I look back on my life’s journey I find that there are many things I intended to do that were clearly not part of God’s plan for me. David wanted desperately to build a temple for God, but that was not God’s intention. God intended for David to become the warrior leader who would establish the throne and prepare the way for his son to build the temple. There are many things in my life I never envisioned which I now believe God both knew and ordained for me.

Just last week Wendy and I were discussing a man we have observed who is aggressively striving after his own intentions, who appears to have failed miserably on many counts, and also appears to be in denial regarding it all. Wendy remarked that the man reminded her of Macbeth who destroyed his life intending to fulfill what he believed was his prophesied path. But, that’s one of the things I love about following God: He eventually redeems even our foolish wanderings and failures for His purposes.

Today, I am reminded to be discerning between my intentions and God’s designs. I desire to lean into the plan God has for me and follow the path laid before me. I have no time to waste blazing trails that lead, at best, to nowhere or, at worst, to tragic ends. I don’t want to end up thinking along the same lines as Macbeth who concluded at the end of his tragic strivings:

Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

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Chapter-a-Day John 5

The healing of a paralytic by Jesus, after Mar...
The healing of a paralytic by Jesus, after Marten de Vos, ca. 1585, from the Bowyer Bible. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

When Jesus saw him and knew he had been ill for a long time, he asked him, “Would you like to get well?” John 5:6 (NLT)

It seems like such a silly question to ask a paralytic sitting by a pool that, as the legend goes, had miraculous healing powers.

“Do you want to get well?”

I’ve found this to be one of the most haunting questions in all of scripture, because it cuts right to the heart of my motives, my desires, and my true willingness to act on them. What I say I want and what my life and actions reveal that I want are daily revealed to be two different things.

“Do you want to get well?”

I do, but maybe I’d rather be sick than have get a job. I like the attention and sympathy I get from others, and the disability check is nice.

“Do you want to get sober?”

I do, but tomorrow after I finish off this last bottle.

“Do you want to work?”

Yes! Are you kidding?! I’ve been searching for months, but I can’t find the job I want (the one that pays me a lot of money, gives great benefits, and doesn’t demand too much of me).

Do you want to know God?”

I do! But, I kind of want a God that fits my lifestyle. I don’t want to be uncomfortable or have to deal with guilt or anything like that. I want to know God, just as long as it’s all positive. You know, answering my prayers and blessing me and loving me and all that stuff without expecting too much of me.

 

I find it interesting that today’s chapter starts with a physically crippled man and ends with spiritually crippled men. Jesus asks the paralytic about his motives and heart desire about getting physically well, then His act of healing reveals the motives and heart desire of those who say they wanted to get spiritually well – but refused the One God had sent who was standing in their midst.

Today, I’m thinking about all of the things I say I desire … but don’t act accordingly. God, forgive me. It’s a good day to make a change.

Chapter-a-Day James 4

god
Image by the|G|™ via Flickr

You want what you don’t have, so you scheme and kill to get it. You are jealous of what others have, but you can’t get it, so you fight and wage war to take it away from them. Yet you don’t have what you want because you don’t ask God for it. And even when you ask, you don’t get it because your motives are all wrong—you want only what will give you pleasure. James 4:2-3 (NLT)

The study of acting is really the study of humanity. To portray a character realistically, you have to understand who this person is, how they think, how they talk, and how they move. You have to understand what makes this character, this person tick. Great actors peel away the layers of a character and get to the heart of who he or she really is. The deeper you understand the character, the more fully you can embody him or her on stage.

As I step into a role, one of the first things that I do is a process called “beating the script.” I break my scenes into “beats” or sections determined by what the character is thinking. The underlying premise is that the character wants or desires something at all times. His or Her words are driven by an internal desire. If you identify the characters ultimate “want” then you can begin to connect the dots of “wants” in each moment of the scene from beginning to end. Then, when you play the scene, you don’t play the words, you play the wants.

What’s interesting about this process is that the truth of it is identified right in God’s Message. It’s in today’s chapter. We are all driven by our wants. We each have deep, core desires that determine the things we do and say each day. We want to be secure. We want to be loved. We want to be rich. We want to be famous. We want [fill in the blank]. As we live in relationship each day, those motivations lead us to thoughts, ideas, words, interactions and behaviors.

So, what is it I really want? That is a question with which we each need to grapple, and find the answer for ourselves. When we do, a lot of other things come into focus.

Chapter-a-day Amos 5

Son of Man (Magritte)
Image by Williamo! via Flickr

People hate this kind of talk. Raw truth is never popular. Amos 5:10 (MSG)

The truth is, Jesus was very popular when He was miraculously feeding thousands with a few fish sandwiches.

Let’s make Jesus king! Why not? He’s a one man welfare program! Let’s follow along. Sure, we’ll have to stand in line, and the crowds are annoying, but we’ll never have to work another day in our lives. Jesus will heal us when we get sick and feed us when we get hungry. What a king Jesus will be!

But then, Jesus simply stopped doing miracles and went up the mountain side by himself. He left a whole line of people standing there waiting to be healed. And, he never came back! What’s up with that?! He disappeared and left the whole crowd of us hungry for breakfast!

There must be some mistake. Rumor has it he’s on the other side of the lake. When did he leave? Why wasn’t there an announcement? They really should start handing out agendas with Jesus’ itinerary. It’s just rude to leave a whole crowd of followers standing around. I tell you, I’m definitely up for making him king and all, but he has got to get his administration organized. He takes off without healing all these sick and lame people who waited all day yesterday. It’s just not fair. And, he leaves without telling us what we’re having for lunch. I hope it’s lamb chops. Anyway, he’s not going to be a very popular king if he doesn’t get act together. I’m hungry, let’s go find him.

Master, what’s the deal? Why did you leave us hungry on the other side of the lake?

Jesus answered, “Very truly I tell you, you are looking for me, not because you saw the signs I performed but because you ate the loaves and had your fill…stop grumbling among yourselves…Very truly I tell you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day. For my flesh is real food and my blood is real drink. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me, and I in them.”

From this time many of his disciples turned back and no longer followed him. [from John 6]

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